The question above is something that I'm wondering: would it be all right for a MGTOWer to be just friends with women? I have been friends with all sorts of women: mostly in a relationship with their boyfriends or even married ones, and I consider them close friends. Lately, I broke down in tears and was comforted by a good female friend. It does show that even MGTOWers may end up in vulnerable situations where someone could hear our cries of agony. I've learned my own lesson from when I was in high school that it's better to just settle for being friends with women instead of actively trying to seek a romantic relationship, but I'm not sure if that would qualify me for being MGTOW.
Youtuber Sandman has published a video on this topic, titled "Just Friends". It gives a good explanation on whether or not being friends with women while being a MGTOWer at the same time would be worth it. While I can say that having female friends does have its positive side benefits, you may want to draw the line between friendship and closer relationship and making sure that you do not cross that line at all costs! However, there may be risks to having female friends, especially if your friendship may grow closer towards 'more than just friends' phase, something that may eventually kill your status of being a MGTOWer.
If you find yourself being friend zoned, you can take advantage of that status for cultivating better friendships while at the same time resisting the urge to get out of the friend zone. Believe me, if you voluntarily enter the friend zone of a woman you like, chances are that you may actually have a better chance of keeping that woman as a close friend instead of trying to get out. Friend zones are a failsafe method of avoiding romantic relationships because you know very well that the woman who friend zoned you has a better chance of seeking a romantic relationship with a non-MGTOWer than with a friend zoned guy who chose to become a MGTOWer.
Overall, it's okay for a MGTOWer and a woman to be just friends, provided that you're actually in the friend zone because it lessens your risk of getting out of the friend zone and giving in to the temptation of seeking a romantic relationship. I voluntarily entered another woman's friend zone for my own sake because I know too well that the woman that I could be in a relationship with deserves men that are much better and far more successful than I am. I know that I'm selling myself short, but that's the point of voluntary inclusion into the friend zone: when you sell yourself short and lessen your value, you lessen your chances of entering a romantic relationship and have a better chances of surviving as a MGTOWer.
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I know that most of my blogs are too short, so in the future I'll try to turn them into essay-like posts for better views.
Tuesday, 21 June 2016
Sunday, 19 June 2016
Is Ebenezer Scrooge a MGTOWer?
The well known Christmas character who used to represent the lust and greediness for profits, Ebenezer Scrooge, could be described as a fictional character who has gone MGTOW. He doesn't have a wife and he remains a single man who owns a money lending business. Before Christmas, he is visited by three Christmas ghosts, one from the past, present and future.In one of his pasts, it is revealed that Scrooge had in fact, gotten engaged to a woman before his love for money drove her towards another man, and Scrooge counted his own blessings as he was able to continue to focus on his career and business instead of what would have been a loveless marriage in which his resources would have been sequestered by his would-be wife. While I don`t wish to bore you readers with the details from his present and future, you can see how the rest of the story goes as Scrooge eventually changes his ways after seeing a grim fate for himself should he go on his current course.
In all aspects of Scrooge's life, I can definitely say that he does embody the essence of both the good kind of MGTOWer and a bad MGTOWer. His good side of MGTOW is that he has enabled himself to keep most of his resources for his own use and he also had the luxury of not being tied down to a woman. However, his bad side of MGTOW is that he didn't spend his money on curing Tiny Tim's tuberculosis before he had a change of heart. While conserving one's own resources may be a good thing, not spending money on improving the lives of other people (be they men or women) is something that a MGTOWer shouldn't do. It was a good thing that Tiny Tim was cured with Scrooge's money because who knows if the little boy could have grown up to become an alpha male or a beta male, or if he could have gone MGTOW as well.
Overall, Ebenezer Scrooge is a complicated case when it comes to whether or not he's a MGTOWer, but his decision to change his ways after watching the future that the Christmas of Yet to Come has made a significant effect on the money lender. His charity towards Tiny Tim is a reflection of how a MGTOWer can use his resources for the betterment of human society instead of being drained to maintain a potential family.
In all aspects of Scrooge's life, I can definitely say that he does embody the essence of both the good kind of MGTOWer and a bad MGTOWer. His good side of MGTOW is that he has enabled himself to keep most of his resources for his own use and he also had the luxury of not being tied down to a woman. However, his bad side of MGTOW is that he didn't spend his money on curing Tiny Tim's tuberculosis before he had a change of heart. While conserving one's own resources may be a good thing, not spending money on improving the lives of other people (be they men or women) is something that a MGTOWer shouldn't do. It was a good thing that Tiny Tim was cured with Scrooge's money because who knows if the little boy could have grown up to become an alpha male or a beta male, or if he could have gone MGTOW as well.
Overall, Ebenezer Scrooge is a complicated case when it comes to whether or not he's a MGTOWer, but his decision to change his ways after watching the future that the Christmas of Yet to Come has made a significant effect on the money lender. His charity towards Tiny Tim is a reflection of how a MGTOWer can use his resources for the betterment of human society instead of being drained to maintain a potential family.
Thursday, 16 June 2016
The Way of MGTOW For Males Viewed as Socially Awkward
I don't deny that I've been socially awkward in my younger years and I had few friends to hang out with. I often wander around by my lonesome during my lunch breaks in high school and I didn't play any sports like the rest of my classmates did. Throughout my high school years, I had terrible luck with the girls, and during my 8th grade I got into a fight with two of them. Yes, I did apologize a few years later, but then the damage was done. I picked fights with girls, and that wasn't a good move but it did provide me with an opportunity to build up my resistance to the temptation of getting a girlfriend, unlike my brother who kept chasing after girls in his high school years.
Now I'm reaching 27 in a couple of months and I still haven't gotten a girlfriend. This means that whatever I did during my younger years worked too well. I'm still a bit uneasy whenever I'm around other people, but I've grown in confidence. To those of you who fit the stereotypical character of a social hermit or a beta male loser, or even socially awkward loner, don't give in to your fear. I am here to give advice on how to overcome these stereotypes that you've been branded with.
First and foremost, it's not easy to embrace your own stereotypes because deep down you want to change yourself to please other people. In my personal experience, this kind of decision to change for the whims of others will never work because you then feel some form of resentment towards the people whom you've forced yourself to change for. Do not change your own personality, because a part of being yourself involves sticking to your own personality. If you're described as a beta male, then that's fine. If you've described yourself as a hermit, use your stereotype to your own advantage. For example, if you have dreams to accomplish, being a social hermit will definitely help you a lot. If you're socially awkward, chances are that you may be intellectually gifted. Use that special gift for your own life.
Embracing one's own stereotypes allows a person to show the attitude of "I'm this and this. So what? I'm proud of it and I'm not going to change that for the likes of you!". It's defiance towards the expectations that human society has for us. The way of MGTOW can be created by anyone who truly wishes to be free to do whatever they want as long as it's within the legal system. If you're a geek or nerd and you're an avid fan of any popular shows, why not become a devoted fan? For example, if a Yugioh fan wanted to collect enough rare cards, it's his freedom to do so while he's a MGTOWer. You can be free to buy booster packs or structure decks for the same amount of money as a dinner for you and your hypothetical girlfriend. What's even better though is that you've gotten more enjoyment out of Yugioh cards than you do having a girlfriend.
Showing your aloof side can also be a good thing, as you proudly show the world that you don't need their approval to do something that you've wanted in your whole life. You can cry down if you've felt too lonely because you can't engage in a conversation with other people because it will help you open up to new possibilities. You can do anything you want to your heart's desire if you're a MGTOWer, and no one will stop you.
If you're socially awkward and you want to learn how to become a confident conversationalist towards other people, you can do that by building your confidence. Go to parties, even if you're socially awkward because at those certain parties you can observe how other guys talk to their girlfriends. Remember, do not approach women acting like you're desperate. Approach women after you've learned from your observations. If the same parties often pop up, then try and go to those parties as well because by then the staff at a bar or nightclub will start noticing you and become familiar with your presence.
My best advice to socially awkward men who want to become MGTOWers, follow my advice and you'll do just as well as men who have wives or girlfriends. Remember, a money spent on a date is a money that could have gone towards your own collection of cars, trading cards or even video games.
Now I'm reaching 27 in a couple of months and I still haven't gotten a girlfriend. This means that whatever I did during my younger years worked too well. I'm still a bit uneasy whenever I'm around other people, but I've grown in confidence. To those of you who fit the stereotypical character of a social hermit or a beta male loser, or even socially awkward loner, don't give in to your fear. I am here to give advice on how to overcome these stereotypes that you've been branded with.
First and foremost, it's not easy to embrace your own stereotypes because deep down you want to change yourself to please other people. In my personal experience, this kind of decision to change for the whims of others will never work because you then feel some form of resentment towards the people whom you've forced yourself to change for. Do not change your own personality, because a part of being yourself involves sticking to your own personality. If you're described as a beta male, then that's fine. If you've described yourself as a hermit, use your stereotype to your own advantage. For example, if you have dreams to accomplish, being a social hermit will definitely help you a lot. If you're socially awkward, chances are that you may be intellectually gifted. Use that special gift for your own life.
Embracing one's own stereotypes allows a person to show the attitude of "I'm this and this. So what? I'm proud of it and I'm not going to change that for the likes of you!". It's defiance towards the expectations that human society has for us. The way of MGTOW can be created by anyone who truly wishes to be free to do whatever they want as long as it's within the legal system. If you're a geek or nerd and you're an avid fan of any popular shows, why not become a devoted fan? For example, if a Yugioh fan wanted to collect enough rare cards, it's his freedom to do so while he's a MGTOWer. You can be free to buy booster packs or structure decks for the same amount of money as a dinner for you and your hypothetical girlfriend. What's even better though is that you've gotten more enjoyment out of Yugioh cards than you do having a girlfriend.
Showing your aloof side can also be a good thing, as you proudly show the world that you don't need their approval to do something that you've wanted in your whole life. You can cry down if you've felt too lonely because you can't engage in a conversation with other people because it will help you open up to new possibilities. You can do anything you want to your heart's desire if you're a MGTOWer, and no one will stop you.
If you're socially awkward and you want to learn how to become a confident conversationalist towards other people, you can do that by building your confidence. Go to parties, even if you're socially awkward because at those certain parties you can observe how other guys talk to their girlfriends. Remember, do not approach women acting like you're desperate. Approach women after you've learned from your observations. If the same parties often pop up, then try and go to those parties as well because by then the staff at a bar or nightclub will start noticing you and become familiar with your presence.
My best advice to socially awkward men who want to become MGTOWers, follow my advice and you'll do just as well as men who have wives or girlfriends. Remember, a money spent on a date is a money that could have gone towards your own collection of cars, trading cards or even video games.
MGTOW and The Challenge Posed by Depression
Even before I've discovered and officially embraced MGTOW, I've been battling with a form of depression. It regularly pops up at an unpredictable time, but the one factor that is the common denominator is stress. However, depression also has a toxic effect on the way we socialize with our peers. Whenever I see a lot of guys having great time with their girlfriends, it makes me envious and more determined at the same time, in an odd sort of way. It made me envious as to how they have it easy, but I'm also determined because it only encouraged me that being single is much better than having a girlfriend. MGTOW is something that can act as a mental and emotional form of spiritual medication a guy needs in order to resist the temptation of seeking out romantic relationships.
Depression, if left untreated, will eventually lead to the most tragic result of all: suicide. Those human beings (whether they be men or women) who constantly wage a never ending struggle against mental depression have a challenging life ahead of themselves. Their outcome will depend on whether or not their victory over mental depression has occurred, and men of all statuses should be aware of how depression can become a toxic matter to a healthy relationship.
As a new explorer to the world of MGTOW, I have a lot to learn about being a MGTOWer and as someone who often felt depressed from time to time, it is something that may either make me a better person, or it is something that will end in my death. I do not wish to die just yet, but I've just found my light of the world in MGTOW. I have no intention to give this up yet.
Depression, if left untreated, will eventually lead to the most tragic result of all: suicide. Those human beings (whether they be men or women) who constantly wage a never ending struggle against mental depression have a challenging life ahead of themselves. Their outcome will depend on whether or not their victory over mental depression has occurred, and men of all statuses should be aware of how depression can become a toxic matter to a healthy relationship.
As a new explorer to the world of MGTOW, I have a lot to learn about being a MGTOWer and as someone who often felt depressed from time to time, it is something that may either make me a better person, or it is something that will end in my death. I do not wish to die just yet, but I've just found my light of the world in MGTOW. I have no intention to give this up yet.
Monday, 13 June 2016
Law and Order SVU Episode "Holden's Manifesto": An Example of How NOT to be MGTOW
The episode of Law and Order Special Victims Unit on "Holden's Manifesto" was actually based on a real life incident where a socially awkward boy resorted to extreme violence in order to get revenge on women who rejected him. The real life incident that gave inspiration for the episode occurred in 2014 at a place called Isla Vista, where a suspect named Elliot Rodger killed six people and injured fourteen others, and in the end the perpetrator himself committed suicide rather than to surrender to police. In the Law and Order SVU episode, the character Holden March simply walked into the window where a police sniper shot him.
Although I'm new to the way of MGTOW, I can tell that what they have done, both the fictional character in the SVU episode and the real life perpetrator in which March, committed serious crimes by targeting their intended victims. Even though MGTOW has arisen in response to the growing frustration that men have when their relationship with women has gone downhill, resorting to violence is simply not the way a MGTOWer should do. In any case, both of these perpetrators came off as needy, desperate men who simply wanted to have social interaction with people of both sexes. While their desperation for social interaction and their subsequent rejection can provide enough motive for them to pull off this heinous crime, their attacks on women can be considered misogynistic.
This is how a MGTOWer should have responded to a situation similar to the one facing SVU's Holden March and the real life Elliot Rodger: follow these advices that I have written in my previous post.
From "Resisting the Temptation to Enter a Relationship":
However, if you really want to enter a relationship with any woman of your own choosing, do it at a good place. A school, a library, a park, and possibly a nightclub. When you go clubbing and you meet the women there, chances are that they're there on a "girls' night out" and they're most likely taken by suitors already. Just engage in simple conversation, but only give them your phone number when they ask you. Remember, resorting to violence against women is not the way of MGTOW, and it would only make our cause more difficult by the political mudslinging, and the epithets that are thrown at MGTOWers: misogynists, sexists, wife-beaters, etc.
Although I'm new to the way of MGTOW, I can tell that what they have done, both the fictional character in the SVU episode and the real life perpetrator in which March, committed serious crimes by targeting their intended victims. Even though MGTOW has arisen in response to the growing frustration that men have when their relationship with women has gone downhill, resorting to violence is simply not the way a MGTOWer should do. In any case, both of these perpetrators came off as needy, desperate men who simply wanted to have social interaction with people of both sexes. While their desperation for social interaction and their subsequent rejection can provide enough motive for them to pull off this heinous crime, their attacks on women can be considered misogynistic.
This is how a MGTOWer should have responded to a situation similar to the one facing SVU's Holden March and the real life Elliot Rodger: follow these advices that I have written in my previous post.
From "Resisting the Temptation to Enter a Relationship":
1) Confidence is the key. Get to know the girl you want to talk to, and pick up a topic that she is most likely to be interested in, even if you don't have any knowledge on the topic she likes.
2) Observe how guys talk to women. Do NOT talk to the guys who just finished a conversation with their lady friends or they'll see you as some competition that isn't worth it.
3) If you are frustrated by your stereotypical outlook, embrace it. Use your stereotype to your advantage and do whatever you want to do with your life.
However, if you really want to enter a relationship with any woman of your own choosing, do it at a good place. A school, a library, a park, and possibly a nightclub. When you go clubbing and you meet the women there, chances are that they're there on a "girls' night out" and they're most likely taken by suitors already. Just engage in simple conversation, but only give them your phone number when they ask you. Remember, resorting to violence against women is not the way of MGTOW, and it would only make our cause more difficult by the political mudslinging, and the epithets that are thrown at MGTOWers: misogynists, sexists, wife-beaters, etc.
Friday, 10 June 2016
Resisting the Temptation to Enter a Relationship
Have you ever had thoughts on whether or not you want to pursue a relationship with a woman everytime you see her? Do you have this needy-like feeling whenever you are amazed by her beauty and personality but it turns out that she's already taken? I had that kind of feeling myself, and the more I encounter women who I will assume whenever I see her as already being taken, I kinda gave up on it. That's fine if you cannot get a woman in your life, because it gives you the motive to form a method of resistance towards the temptation to enter a relationship.
I have gone to parties in nightclubs where I have fun dancing and chatting with people, and while I do admit that those aren't the best places to talk to women, I have managed to use those experience to gain confidence needed to stay single. All the single men out there who are viewed by women as simply "out of their league" need not to feel discouraged. Use your "below standards" brand to your advantage by pursuing the things that you love to do. Even as I continue to learn more about the MGTOW culture, staying single does have benefits:
- Aside from the obviously mentioned freedom to pursue your own hobbies, you also avoid the drama that dominates all romantic relationships. You avoid the pitfalls of getting into arguments with your girlfriend because of one minor problem.
- Further isolation for those who don't have the necessary skills to interact with people has resulted in less confidence, but loners do tend to become secretive about their lives. I have this tendency too, and it succeeded in keeping some of my work and social lives separate.
- Avoiding the pitfalls of married life also prevents you from falling into the dreaded possibility of divorce and custody battles that would have ensured that the custody of one's children would fall on the mother instead of the father.
So let's take an example of a guy who is described by his peers as "nerdy looking": that aforementioned 'nerd' tries his luck at chatting up with women, and they immediately get turned off because of his appearance. They would often dismiss themselves as someone that is "out of his league" and hooks up with more successful, non-nerdy looking men. The subject in question becomes less confident of his ability to talk to women and as a result he isolates himself from society and becomes a hermit. If the subject in question approaches me for an advice on how to be a better communicator towards women, here are the things that I'd tell him:
1) Confidence is the key. Get to know the girl you want to talk to, and pick up a topic that she is most likely to be interested in, even if you don't have any knowledge on the topic she likes.
2) Observe how guys talk to women. Do NOT talk to the guys who just finished a conversation with their lady friends or they'll see you as some competition that isn't worth it.
3) If you are frustrated by your stereotypical outlook, embrace it. Use your stereotype to your advantage and do whatever you want to do with your life.
Also, if you really feel adventurous enough to try and forget about entering a relationship with a woman, you can always join your country's military. A life in the military will certainly keep you occupied and your confidence will grow so much that you would forget about having a comfortable civilian life and dedicate yourself to your career. This is another option for those who have the guts, but not everyone is fit for military life. The option that fits every single guy out there though, is to devote yourself to your career and your own personal, girlfriend-free life. If someone asks you if you're gay when you say that you don't have a girlfriend, politely say no and say that you're busy with your career and that you don't have time to look for a girlfriend. That works too.
I have gone to parties in nightclubs where I have fun dancing and chatting with people, and while I do admit that those aren't the best places to talk to women, I have managed to use those experience to gain confidence needed to stay single. All the single men out there who are viewed by women as simply "out of their league" need not to feel discouraged. Use your "below standards" brand to your advantage by pursuing the things that you love to do. Even as I continue to learn more about the MGTOW culture, staying single does have benefits:
- Aside from the obviously mentioned freedom to pursue your own hobbies, you also avoid the drama that dominates all romantic relationships. You avoid the pitfalls of getting into arguments with your girlfriend because of one minor problem.
- Further isolation for those who don't have the necessary skills to interact with people has resulted in less confidence, but loners do tend to become secretive about their lives. I have this tendency too, and it succeeded in keeping some of my work and social lives separate.
- Avoiding the pitfalls of married life also prevents you from falling into the dreaded possibility of divorce and custody battles that would have ensured that the custody of one's children would fall on the mother instead of the father.
So let's take an example of a guy who is described by his peers as "nerdy looking": that aforementioned 'nerd' tries his luck at chatting up with women, and they immediately get turned off because of his appearance. They would often dismiss themselves as someone that is "out of his league" and hooks up with more successful, non-nerdy looking men. The subject in question becomes less confident of his ability to talk to women and as a result he isolates himself from society and becomes a hermit. If the subject in question approaches me for an advice on how to be a better communicator towards women, here are the things that I'd tell him:
1) Confidence is the key. Get to know the girl you want to talk to, and pick up a topic that she is most likely to be interested in, even if you don't have any knowledge on the topic she likes.
2) Observe how guys talk to women. Do NOT talk to the guys who just finished a conversation with their lady friends or they'll see you as some competition that isn't worth it.
3) If you are frustrated by your stereotypical outlook, embrace it. Use your stereotype to your advantage and do whatever you want to do with your life.
Also, if you really feel adventurous enough to try and forget about entering a relationship with a woman, you can always join your country's military. A life in the military will certainly keep you occupied and your confidence will grow so much that you would forget about having a comfortable civilian life and dedicate yourself to your career. This is another option for those who have the guts, but not everyone is fit for military life. The option that fits every single guy out there though, is to devote yourself to your career and your own personal, girlfriend-free life. If someone asks you if you're gay when you say that you don't have a girlfriend, politely say no and say that you're busy with your career and that you don't have time to look for a girlfriend. That works too.
Thursday, 2 June 2016
Why I Chose to Explore MGTOW
Let me say for the record that I'm still relatively new to this whole MGTOW business, but I'm an avid learner and really interested in what MGTOW has to offer me. So basically, what is MGTOW? It does stand for Men Going Their Own Way, as in men who fully embrace their right to live their lives as they see fit. In terms of relationships, I learned that MGTOW stands for men retaining their right to stay single. But some of you may ask me, why MGTOW? I may get questions like 'when will you get married?' or 'are you misogynistic?' or whatever other questions that you may have that I might not have an easy answer. So the real question you all should ask me is: "why did you choose to embrace this new and foreign concept?"
I chose to learn more about MGTOW as a social concept because I often describe myself as one of the stereotypical male losers who has a high failure rate of getting a girlfriend, but as it turns out, inability to acquire a girlfriend to me is a blessing in disguise as I indulge deeper into the whole MGTOW business. Yes, I'm just a beginner but guess what? A lot of veteran MGTOWers were at one point beginners too. I have hobbies, dreams and a social life of my own that is entirely different from the other men who aren't a part of the MGTOW movement. MGTOW masculinity is definitely not a toxic one, despite the claims of masculinity being the contrary by anarchists and Marxists who view "toxic masculinity" (sarcasm fully intended) as potentially destructive, but what they don't realize is that by bashing this kind of masculinity, they only succeeded in driving more ordinary men into accepting the MGTOW philosophy because they don't want to be at the mercy of the radical feminist movement who wouldn't be bothered to hide their contempt for any concerns for men.
I have also described myself as a loner despite having a good amount of friends. However, I don't consider loneliness as a liability, but rather a defiant symbol of a man's desire to move in a different direction from what human society has dictated that we do. I have personally witnessed my parents' explosive relationships with each other and with other people, so I have commended myself for not repeating the mistakes that my parents made. My brother on the other hand, is a hopeless fool who constantly chases after women, unaware that any moves he makes towards marriage will result in his loss of freedom, hobby and dreams.
Thus I've given my short introduction on my journey into MGTOW. Please don't hesitate to lecture me on this philosophy so I can grow further into a mature member of the MGTOW movement.
I chose to learn more about MGTOW as a social concept because I often describe myself as one of the stereotypical male losers who has a high failure rate of getting a girlfriend, but as it turns out, inability to acquire a girlfriend to me is a blessing in disguise as I indulge deeper into the whole MGTOW business. Yes, I'm just a beginner but guess what? A lot of veteran MGTOWers were at one point beginners too. I have hobbies, dreams and a social life of my own that is entirely different from the other men who aren't a part of the MGTOW movement. MGTOW masculinity is definitely not a toxic one, despite the claims of masculinity being the contrary by anarchists and Marxists who view "toxic masculinity" (sarcasm fully intended) as potentially destructive, but what they don't realize is that by bashing this kind of masculinity, they only succeeded in driving more ordinary men into accepting the MGTOW philosophy because they don't want to be at the mercy of the radical feminist movement who wouldn't be bothered to hide their contempt for any concerns for men.
I have also described myself as a loner despite having a good amount of friends. However, I don't consider loneliness as a liability, but rather a defiant symbol of a man's desire to move in a different direction from what human society has dictated that we do. I have personally witnessed my parents' explosive relationships with each other and with other people, so I have commended myself for not repeating the mistakes that my parents made. My brother on the other hand, is a hopeless fool who constantly chases after women, unaware that any moves he makes towards marriage will result in his loss of freedom, hobby and dreams.
Thus I've given my short introduction on my journey into MGTOW. Please don't hesitate to lecture me on this philosophy so I can grow further into a mature member of the MGTOW movement.
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